In the last few hours, it has been announced that the Duchess of Cambridge is expecting her second child; and like her first pregnancy she is suffering with hyperemesis gravidarum. I suffered with hyperemesis gravidarum when I was pregnant with Boo and completely sympathise with how Catherine is feeling.
Hyperemesis gravidarum is the reason I found out I was pregnant, after being ill for a few weeks, I went to my GP who was concerned something pretty serious was wrong with me, so sent me to the hospital who told me I was nearly 10 weeks pregnant – the happiest surprise ever!
The doctors assured me that my ‘morning sickness’ would calm down in a few weeks and that it was perfectly normal to feel dreadful in the first trimester. By week 12 I was begging to feel dreadful – my sickness and general health became so bad that coupled with migraines I was eventually forced to take early maternity at 26 weeks.
Three and a half years later, it’s not a happy time I look back on, most people suffer from mild to moderate morning sickness but on the whole they spend time planning for the baby’s arrival; welcoming the changes to their body. I felt as if I had an alien force taking over my body, making the simplest tasks seem like climbing a mountain – I remember crying because I couldn’t wash my hair in the shower then crying even more at how pathetic and useless I felt. Hyperemesis gravidarum not only turns your world upside down physically but also has an immense on your mind; I felt so isolated and alone – people still have the misconception that it’s merely bad morning sickness and that you can shake it off and ‘carry on like all the other pregnant woman’. After a while you even feel bad ringing family and friends to say you’re in hospital again to be rehydrated and monitored; I even went through a period when I began to believe the negativity that I really was just making a meal of it and needed to man up; it’s a feeling I never want to feel again – feelings of failure and inadequacy – If I can’t handle pregnancy, then how the hell am I going to fare as a parent?
One of the handful of happy moments during my pregnancy
To simple dismiss hyperemesis gravidarum as really bad morning sickness is not only factually wrong and rather insulting but can be extremely hurtful to the expectant mother, this condiditon is debilitating, relentless and all consuming, turning what should be one of the happiest times in a woman’s life into sometimes their darkest months.
Hyperemesis gravidarum in part (along with premature labour) is a massive reason why I probably won’t have any more children, not only is it that I don’t think I can do it again, it’s also down to not wanting to ever feel like that again – does that make me selfish? I don’t think any of us can judge another person for their choices and especially the media attention that will no doubt be focused on the Duchess of Cambridge over the coming months, Hyperemesis gravidarum isn’t; something I would wish on my worst enemy let along a pregnant woman, so cut her and all sufferers some slack – you can’t make us feel any worse than we do.
I had really bad morning sickness all the way through all 4 of my pregnancies but know I didn’t have this. Once they wanted to hospitalise me but I have a needle phobia. So I can begin to understand how awful it must have been, as I was in bed a lot.. What are the stats that if you have suffered once you will again? This is a good post for raising awareness.
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This isn’t something that I’ve suffered from thankfully, but I do know some people who have and it really knocked them for six at a time when they already felt more emotional and nervous than usual.
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Thankfully mine never got as bad as this but I remember thinking I would never feel well again at some stages. My lowest point was when I was sick driving home from work and all I could do was keep driving while covered in spew!
I too had HG with both of my pregnancies and so understand this post. I have blocked out just how bad it was. How much I wanted to die and the horror of it all
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I am with you fully on this, I suffered with both my pregnancies and in the end was put on a drip. It didn’t matter what the time of day was I was just as sick, I feel for poor Kate but at least she has beside care 24hrs a day. When you are sick with your second its a miserable time for all the family. xxx
That’s one of my real fears, how could I put Boo through it – it’s not necessarily the effect on me (although I’m welling up at even the the thought) but on everyone I love and care about x
I have chronic migraines got so bad when I was pregnant with my first , ended up going into hospital it was that bad . Still have them had tests and everything .x
This must be so awful I had morning sickness up until 16 weeks or so, but can’t imagine how debilitating HG would be. I don’t think you are being selfish stopping at one child x
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My friend suffered from this and ended up in hospital a number of times. Really felt for her as she didn’t enjoy her pregnancy at all!
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Thankfully I never suffered from sickness as bad as this 🙁
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Not something I can relate too as ive never been pregnant, but having read about it, it sounds absolutely awful x
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My sickness was so bad I was signed off work with dehydration. Nothing would stay down. Not a pleasant experience and it did take some of the pregnancy joy away x
must be awful to be so sick, I’ve been lucky all four times to not really have very much morning sickness
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It’s so great that media has actually talked about this condition and more pregnant mothers are being to understand it.
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It really annoys me when people say ‘oh it’s just morning sickness and other people have to deal with it’ about poor kate! There is a HUGE difference! x
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